Written in the summer of 2011
“He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began.”-Leo Tolstoy.
I agree that most things said about love are true. Whether by writer or doctor, artist or lawyer, beloved or not… Everything is true; at least, for someone.
After all, we all have different perspectives and beliefs.
When talking about love there is no exception, if anything; love is the one thing that is as vast as the world itself, as the ocean and the air, the atmosphere and beyond.
But what causes love? Does the cause-effect phenomenon apply to it too? Could it be that love is the cause for love itself?
But then, it doesn’t make any sense to try to detect which one is the cause and which one the effect since you can’t know when or where one begins and one ends. It doesn’t make any sense to try to figure out how to find it if it’s what you have.
If you give it, it’s because you have it.
But you have it because you give it… or you give it because you have it?
Maybe that’s the magic about love. It’s never-ending.
It’s like the sea stretching through the horizon. The water melts with the sky at the sunrise and at the sunset. You can’t know for sure where the water ends and the sky begins. The sun is the only factor that can tell you where you stand, at the set or the rise.
“We picture love as heart-shaped because we do not know the shape of the soul.”-Robert Brault.
True or false?
I pick true.
What does a soul look like? Does it have a shape for instance? And the heart? Who says love comes from the heart? And who says the mind is in the brain? Science doesn’t. Aren’t people always whining about anything that science doesn’t state is not true?
Nervous impulses come from the brain, and blood comes from the heart, that we are sure of. But love? Where do feelings come from?
I suppose imagining love like a heart is the closest thing we can do to shape it.
But what if it came from all of ourselves? What if it was in every part of our being, of our body, in every cell? And what if it was the same with our mind and with our soul? Or better yet, what if all those things expanded even beyond our bodies, what if they were limitless and without an end?
And then I wonder, why do human beings always need to shape things? To give them a form we can understand?
One thing is clear to me.
We are awfully scared of even having the idea of something we don’t understand, something shapeless, something we still have got to learn, something we don’t really know the answer to that we choose to give those unknown things some shape that we can relate to the way we see the world. And yet, giving something a particular shape won’t always make us understand it and that’s where fear steps in and fear leads to hate, more often than not.
Maybe that’s why we need to have an explanation for everything.
Maybe that’s why we shape love. And God. And evil. And, truth be told, every little thing that comes into our lives that we don’t understand.
We just have to give everything an explanation always, right?
And again I prove the point that men fear what they do not understand.
We always have, I only hope that we won’t always will.
I wonder what happens when someone fearless comes around? Maybe they got it best. Maybe they’re the ones who get to actually understand life in the end and to live it fully.
But then again, you don’t really have to be fearless. You just have to be brave.
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.”-Ambrose Redmoon.
I think we should all remember that next time we’re afraid of something, and for most people, that is every day.
But being afraid doesn’t mean we’re not brave.
I think each of us decides who we want to be, the hero or the coward.
As with everything in life, it’s our choice.
“A bell is no bell ’til you ring it,
A song is no song ’til you sing it,
And love in your heart
Wasn’t put there to stay
Love isn’t love
‘Til you give it away.”-Oscar Hammerstein, Sound of Music, “You Are Sixteen (Reprise)”
What can you do with love if you have it but to give it away? If you make your heart a cage for love to stay it will only fade away. But if you set it free to fly and to be, then it will always return to you, stronger and lovelier.
If you don’t believe it… try it.
See for yourself… But there’s a little trick… the secret of life.
Turns out 20/20 vision isn’t really that useful, so I’ve heard and so I’ve learned…
“And now here’s my secret, a very simple secret; it is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.”-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
That I know to be true.
When have your eyes warned you about falling? Maybe lots of times but… When have your eyes warned you, prevent you from falling in love?
Your eyes can tell you: Hey, watch out! There’s a hole in the ground! Don’t fall!
But I’ve never known someone whose eyes can actually say: Hey, dude! Be careful! There’s love! Don’t get near it or you will fall really hard!
No. If anything, you might think it is not such a good idea. Maybe because you’ve been hurt before so you are really trying to take more precautions from now on. Maybe you actually think it is better to shut every part of yourself to other people, including your heart, especially your heart, so that you won’t feel pain.
But then, you will surely miss out on many things in life because, believe it or not, your eyes can’t possibly be right of what they’re seeing since they only see the surface.
It’s like the ocean, again. You can see the surface. You can see the water and the waves. You can avoid the waves from hitting you by not standing too close. You can sigh at the wonderful sight of the dark water sparkling with the reflection of the silver moon in the night and marvel at the beautiful colors the water takes when the sun sets or rises. That’s true.
You can see many wonders and avoid many dangers by keeping a safe distance from the ocean. But, if so, you will never really know what is happening below the surface, where it matters the most. How is life developing down there? What’s moving and what is stirring? What magnificent sights and experiences may be waiting for you underwater? You can’t know unless you dive in.
It’s the same with love and we’re curious enough to dive in. I promise that. At least, once in a while.
“You don’t have to go looking for love when it’s where you come from.”-Werner Erhard.
Exactly. That’s it. You come from love, believe it or not. But may I tell you something? You live happier believing you do.
And whatever you believe in, will become true.
If you believe it all the way through and through, it will come true. At least for you.
And really, who else do you need it to believe it?
“We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love.” -Tom Robbins.
The one thing that everyone can see, the one thing that is clear to everyone’s eyes is that everyone is looking for love.
Everyone does, at some point in our lives, at least, once in every lifetime.
But something’s wrong because even though everybody is searching it seems that nobody is finding it. They look and look and look and then… They keep looking. Some think they’ve found it but then they hurt cause it turns out it really wasn’t what they thought it would or should be. Some give up and decide they are better off alone. Some continue their never-ending search but they’re faithless. Others are faithful… So they keep searching and searching…
But do they find?
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.-Buddha.
I believe it’s the same with love.
Have you ever thought that the simple action of looking for love in your life implies that you don’t have it? Because if you have something already, why go looking for it? Have you ever wondered how your life would be if you turned things around?
How would your life change if instead of thinking that you need to have something, do something or be with someone in order to be happy or loved… You started thinking that first you have to be happy and loving and then everything else will fall into place. What if it started first with a state of being? With something that comes from inside of us, instead of outside of us?
Wouldn’t it be much easier if we believed that everything we need we could find within? Then we could stop searching for love because then we would know that we already have it.
The secret… The truth? The reason why it seems love is running out on planet Earth? Is it because there are no more decent men and women left on this planet? Is it because nobody is worth the while? Is it true that trusting is just for the fools?
We all look for love, we all search for it…
Why is love so hard to find?
And the truth is…
Being a searcher is not so useful.
Being a searcher is not the path, not the fastest anyway, and that’s because of this simple reason…
Being a searcher of love doesn’t help because EVERYONE IS SEARCHING FOR IT. EVERYONE.
Everyone is searching. Then, as a result, there’s nobody left to find because they are searching too. Everyone is searching for it… there are so many searching! The world is crowded with searchers, crowded with people who think they are lacking love in their lives because they fail to find it within; and since the world doesn’t need any more of those…
Then why not being the prize instead? The treasure? The love?
Why not being the one to find?
Do not attempt to win the prize, BE the prize.
That’s my answer. Be the ones they get to find not the ones that get to search. Be all you want to find in another. Be loving, be kind, be courageous, be fun and funny, be interesting, be generous, be happy, be love. Be the one who loves and you will be loved back.
If you don’t believe it… Try it.
2 thoughts on “Love Through Time”
Mariel I love this essay so much! So true, I always felt the same, that there are too many people carrying that emptiness in them and just projecting it on people they meet.. the answer is always to become love instead of looking for it
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Yes! I believe this too! And the more we become love the more we attract loving people to our lives 😀 Thank you so much my dear Anna for commenting and following! xx